Retirement Homes: Are they a trap?

I find it really weird that I have been working around the elderly for four months, and in that time I’ve only connected to my grandparents once.

It’s not that I don’t want to see my grandparents. Because we’re Filipino, we’re supposed to check on our grandparents almost every day, and pay them with the ultimate respect. I’ve just been really busy with school and I have a job at a retirement home, where I serve the residents their meals.

It’s a stressful job if you can’t handle old people yelling at you every five seconds when they don’t get what they want, but the appreciation is unbeatable. Over the three months I’ve worked there, I managed to learn each residents’ favorite drink and health issues.  

A lot of my coworkers are very young, so sometimes we make mistakes, but I feel like we’re all the residents have. No offense to the families, but why would you leave your father or your mother at a place where they’d be restricted for the rest of their lives? Why not at least visit them frequently? I would never put my dad through that.

One time at work, we had to have a quick meeting about addressing the residents’ attitudes when something doesn’t go their way. One of the reasons to understand their impatience was that they are old and alone. The realization of being old sparks a sad nostalgic memory of what you used to do, and what you can’t do now. That itself should already be depressing and very hard to accept, so I understand the hostility after that. What I don’t understand is that there are some residents who are never with their children.

Let’s look at it this way. If I want to go out, I’d have to take a bus that goes here to there from this time to that time. If I want to eat, I’d come to this place, sit down, and order on the same menu. I’d go home, watch some TV, and repeat the same cycle every day. From time to time, there would be special events. But I’ll never see the beauty in life like being able to go out grocery shopping with your family or attend a graduation barbeque. No one would be there to take me.

I understand that it’s probably safer to put your parents in assisted living, and more than 70 percent of America agrees with you. But once you push your parents through those doors, make sure that’s not the last time you see them. Keep them up to date, or even plan out a full day away from the retirement home every two weeks. Even though I’m so busy, I’d still call my grandma to check on her once and while. If I don’t, then she’d call me. She calls me every day. Retirement homes are not to bad and they can truly help those in need. If you or a loved one are starting to look into retirement homes then click here check out the designing facilities and homes for assisted living. This will help you find the right place for you or your loved one.

Don’t get me wrong. There are some good children out there who visit their mom and dad every Sunday or so for a good brunch, but sometimes I see the same resident sitting alone at the same spot every day. Then I wonder if their children still call them or even send them a card once and awhile. We have to understand that grandparents and the elderly are still people, and they deserve the best throughout the last years of their lives.